Discerning "Exit Signs" in Life by Listening to Our Bodies

It’s not always clear which exit signs are ours to follow. When do we stay on the road we’re on, in any area of our life, and when do we decide it’s time to take the off-ramp and move on to something else? 

Exit signs are about making decisions, discerning when it is time to change course. So what are the ways you’ve learned to navigate that decision-making process? What signs matter most to you to know when to exit?

Do you listen to that intuitive place in yourself that just seems to “know” what the right direction is? Or do you prefer to lean on your analytical brain that can strategize, make a plan, and minimize risk? Do you trust others in your life to help you know when to make an exit, or are they just back-seat drivers who you’d prefer keep their opinions to themselves?

Whatever your answer, a more revealing question is what is behind your preferences? Do you feel more secure making decisions one way or another? How much do you like to feel in control? Or perhaps there are things you want to avoid by not thinking about a decision too much or taking ownership of it.

Regardless of our preferred ways of making decisions, it can be helpful to expand our ways of listening and noticing, paying attention to multiple sources of information that can help us to notice exit signs and decide if they are the correct route for us to take. 

So I want to offer a simple practice of listening to the body’s wisdom as one more way of noticing signs of what might be most truly life-giving for us, or most in alignment with who we most deeply are. 

Though it may sound odd, our bodies have a way of knowing that brings with them our history and experiences that have shaped us. They carry all of our unprocessed emotions, and if we pay close attention, our bodies are actually the location where we experience our emotions, even though they are often connected with related thoughts or narratives in our minds. 

And bodies also have ways of communicating what we are truly feeling, though we often do not pay attention if we are prone to living in our heads. For example, we might have thoughts of gratitude about a specific relationship, or a passing thought that everything is going to be okay, but we actually experience gratitude, joy, and peace in embodied ways. 

Practice Listening to Your Body

So as you consider a decision, and whether a particular exit is right for you to take, I invite you to try this. 

First, sit comfortably, close your eyes, and feel your breath in your body, as your chest and abdomen rise and fall. 

Next, bring to mind either the status quo, the road you’re already on, or the off-ramp that represents the decision that you are considering taking. With that picture or situation in mind, breath in and out a few times. 

Then scan your body, noticing if there are areas of tightness, discomfort, or areas that feel lighter, or more secure. 

Next, have compassion for that part of yourself, and ask to be with it for a moment. Ask it what it might have to show you about where its feeling (whether positive or negative) is coming from. 

Wait, and be present with yourself, and see if different memories, thoughts, pictures, or intuitive senses begin to surface. It may not be immediately clear, and that is okay. Sometimes simply noticing whether we have strong hesitations or genuine excitement can be a helpful starting place for our discernment. 

Just because we feel anxious about something does not mean it is not the right direction to move in! This is not about avoidance of discomfort in our body, but about listening to it, seeing why we might feel one way or another. Sometimes it just needs to be felt and gently acknowledged before we can continue to move through stuck places in our lives. 

The result is greater self-awareness, listening tenderly to our inner responses and motivations that are revealed in our body.